Dating red flags are basically signs that tell you to run. All kidding aside, dating is great but sometimes we find ourselves in unsatisfactory situations with equally unsatisfactory people. When this happens we must navigate our way out. The key here is knowing the red flags before building a relationship with someone. People give off warning signs long before things get serious. The key is knowing what the signs are. Below are some red flags in dating to watch out for.
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A Bad Attitude
Watch how your date treats wait staff, ushers, cashiers, baristas and anyone else you come in contact with on your date. Responding to the slightest mistake or irritant with a nasty attitude clearly, displays that they aren’t very kind. No one wants to start a relationship with a rude and disrespectful person so don’t turn a blind eye. If you ignore this red flag, you’ll be on the receiving end of the negativity soon enough.
One of the most common dating red flags for women to look out for is jealousy. You can tell if a person is a jealous type from the very start. For example, asking too many questions about your past relationships and a current social circle is signs. Another to watch out for is tracking your eyes to see who you are looking at during outings together. Those with the jealous trait do these things in an attempt to gain a false sense of control. In other words, this isn’t something you want to deal with.
If in search of dating red flags for men, early signs of neediness are all too common. Dating a girl who constantly seeks your validation and approval is exhausting. Early signs include:
- Wanting a commitment a few dates in. Needy women feel more secure when they have a boyfriend. The problem is, they often like the idea of having a boyfriend more than the actual boyfriend.
- Fishing for compliments. As said, needy women regularly seek validation. This is another way to do it.
- Asking you if other women are attractive. This is her trying to measure how attractive she is. Females use your feedback as well as whether they think the woman they asked about is less or more attractive than them to determine this.
The above is only the beginning of what you’ll endure if the relationship continues.
You don’t want to date someone who is your emotional junior. Immature individuals haven’t learned that there are a time and place for certain behavior. If there’s a point in the date where you find yourself embarrassed by their actions, the attraction is probably gone too so cut your losses.
This red flag is a little out there but it happens. Some will actually treat dates rudely at the very start in an attempt to break them down and gain control. This is often in the form of backhanded compliments, judgmental comments, and assumptions that just don’t sit well. Let’s not forget that people make mistakes so address this red flag. If you get a sincere apology, perhaps this wasn’t a warning after all. On the other hand, if the disrespect worsens after addressing it or you get the, “Lighten up” response, throw in the towel. Someone that exhibits such passive aggressive behavior for no reason is not a good match.
Drinking Too Much
This is one of the red flags in dating that gives you free rein to walk out. Seriously, just leave and call a cab for both their safety and the safety of others. If your date gets intoxicated and/or becomes belligerent, don’t look back.
Let’s Talk About Sex…
This tops the list of first date red flags and online dating red flags. If you’re on a date with someone or corresponding online and they find a way to bring sex into the conversation, that isn’t the person for you. This is a red flag because it shows no respect for boundaries. Even worse, they’re probably just looking for a hookup.
The Divorcee Red Flags
Dating a divorced man red flags, or woman for that matter, come into play all too often. Dating someone after their divorce is fine. If the chemistry is there, there’s no reason to avoid it. That being said, there are some things to look out for. Here are the top 3:
1. The Rebound
Be careful if you get the feeling that you’re the rebound or the person you’re dating is moving things along too quickly. People rebound differently. One group is looking for a series of flings. This is fine if you want the same but if not, you may get your heart broken. The second group wants to jump right into another serious relationship. This is a problem because people need time to heal. Otherwise, the next relationship is bound to end in disaster. There is no reason to set yourself up for failure.
2. The Bad Mouther
You should be weary of anyone who will openly bad mouth their ex. Even if things didn’t end well, talking badly about a partner shows a lack of respect. It is also a clear sign that he/she isn’t over the divorce.
3. The Unworthy Dater
If you’re seeing someone that is self-loathing, you may want to move on. When a person says things like, “I don’t deserve you” and means it, they feel unworthy of someone’s attention and affection. Yeah, this may seem sweet at first and then you start to wonder why. This is often an indicator of low self-esteem which can rear its ugly head in the form of jealousy further down the line. Additionally, he or she can be trying to mask something they feel bad about. More specifically, something that happened in their marriage.
Overall, there is a lot to look out for but remember that there are some great people out there too. You may have to go through a few misses but that’s part of dating! As long as you know when to check someone off the list, you’ll find the right one soon enough.